14580: Burnham replies to Higbie and Gwo Du Tuyaul; dogs sleeping with cats (fwd)

[Bob Corbett <corbetre@webster.edu>]

From: thor burnham <thorald_mb@hotmail.com>

>From Thor Burnham in Gros Morne, and not "Ti" Buron:

Janet Higbie stated:
    "A rhetorical question:  Is the sparring match between Burnham and Du
Tuyau reminding anyone else, other than me, of Dan Quayle v. Murphy Brown?"

Burnham:
    Hey, Du Tuyau, Higbie doesn't think you are a real person, personally
speaking. What do you make of that?.... Or maybe she doesn't think I'm a
real person? Which could be more of a problem. I'm shocked, shockingly so.
Could it be!!?? And she says that slick willy was impeached, Ken Starringly
so, but not convicted criminally speaking of cigar penetrating pedantically
so?
Oh, by the way, are we sparring, Du Tuyau? What do you think? Sounds so,
Americanly American great States...but in the event we are coming out of our
corners for another round, I'm Lennox Lewis and you can be Mike Tyson. Deal?
    By the way, Du Tuyau, funny you should mention this stuff about human
rights organizations. I went and talked to some people who know everybody
who is working in one of the kitchens, and everybody who has worked there
the last 25 years. They've seen em all. I told them i've got this crazy
salad tosser accusing the human rights organizations of not only being
biased, but also of being deliberately dishonest. I said, "My friend has
been tossing salads too long". They said, "Hey, listen Ti bout patat, that
saladmaker friend of yours is onto something, there. Neg sa kone sa l'ap
di!". Another friend, he makes a nice club sandwich, tells me that you are
the first one in ten years who has addressed the question of the human
rights organizations and their legitimacy. "After all, anyone can call
themselves a human rights worker, can't they? And, even if the people on the
ground are honest and have the country's best interests at heart, the
information they gather can, and does, get into the wrong hands, does it
not?"
I said that wasn't likely. He said, "Oh yeah, then how do they know who to
disappear? How do they find those people so easily? Where do the human
rights workers go when they aren't human rights workers?"

    And, Monsieur Du Tuyau, wouldn't you know it if i didn't hear some other
stuff this weekend about NCHR....hmmmm. But who is funding NCHR now, Du
Tuyau? Aren't they member driven and funded? Aren't they righteous? Are you
arguing that the big chef now is so biased against Aristide that everything
NCHR does is tainted? wow. serious stuff. So, are you saying that evey
though they claim to be tossing a better Christophe salad, they are in fact
tossing a salad Duvalier? Or a Waldorf makout? Are the people running the
day to day in bed with the people they are investigating? That would be
pretty bad, wouldn't it? I hope that isn't the case Du Tuyau, since it might
throw everything into disrepute....

Du Tuyau states:
    "So,  ...  and therefore, ... and logically speaking, they chose in the
choice of smart public relations, they chose Jean-Jacques Honorat to run
over government that responsibility in the eventuality of time, was
responsible for 3, maybe 4, maybe 5,000 poor Haitian people death. So you
understanding me now a little Mister Burnham, when I always a little bit
suspicious of human rights organizations."

Burnham:
     Hmmm. You know, maybe you are right. I went the other day to talk to
one of my favourite cooks. He makes a real nice griot, you know, not too
greasy, but nice and soft. I mentioned you, the saladtosser, and He told me
that he was dumbstruck when the Ford Foundation and the U.N. decided to fund
JJH as a human rights worker. But i said, "Come on, why would they choose
someone like that?" He looks at me and says, "Monsieur te kone tout detay,
net!"
"Of what?", i asked him. My Griot says, "JJH knew every little detail. He
knew who the opposition was in detail, specifically speaking." But I said,
"c'mon, this is the U.N. we're talking about!?" He says, "Exactly my
point!!"
"In fact", he said, "Just look at the United Great States. They are
recycling Otto Reich, Elliot Abrams, John Noriega and John Poindexter. It's
the same thing, isn't it?" Hmmm. I didn't have an answer.

Du Tuyau states:
     "So, if we're  using it this method in the correctiveness of things,
that method correctly correctamente, we know, we know for sure that
something is being cooked in the kitchen. And Mister Burnham, it is not
Dessalines-Petion-Toussaint-Christophe salad."

Burnham:
     Ok, but wait a minute Du Tuyau, who's kitchen are we talking about? I
think i know which kitchen i'm talking about. And you say you know which
kitchen you are talking about. Are we talking about the same kitchen? You
first.

Du Tuyau States:
     "It may be the Conze salad. I no like Conze salad."

Burnham
    Which Conze are you talking about? Is this the traitor salad, or the
Catholic Saint salad? Or are those the same thing? Maybe its the Butler
Salad? Or the Cole Cucumberland?

Du Tuyau States:
     "So Mister Burnham, who responsibility is responsible for NCHR all day
every day every time? Mister Jonathan Demme? Or the chefs in Haiti and
United States Great States that do work daily activity every day? Please
tell me a little."

Burnham:
     Personally, while i like Jonathon Demme a lot, especially the
Philadelphia movie (has a great soundtrack too, don't you think? especially
that one song) you are right, he's probably not running the day to day.
     This reminds me. I used to work with a guy from South Africa. We worked
together for a garbage company. Always interesting to see what people threw
out. One day while we were hauling boxes of old Victoria Secret Underwear
magazines to the truck, I started to ask him some questions.(and we didn't
look at one magazine, by the way) When I asked him what he did before he
came to my country he said he was in the South African military. He was in
charge of a small troop of peacekeepers in one of the townships. For months
and months when he and his group would go out on patrol, people would
complain and complain and complain that the gov't was funding and supporting
a paramilitary group that worked the townships at night, arresting and
disappearing activists and troublemakers. My friend says he argued with
people all the time about the existence of this mysterious group, always
saying that if they existed he would know. He said, "There was no way I
could not have known what was going on." But then he got quiet. He told me
that six months later he found out that indeed there was secret police
activity going on in his area. They were harassing people, kidnapping,
raping and torturing others, and of course disappearing those who were
intractable. And, of course, they were using my friend's activity reports
for intelligence. He was, in fact, unknowingly supplying the secret police
with their information.

    sigh. I hope you are wrong about the NCHR, Du Tuyau. But I have an awful
feeling you might be right. But I also have to say, I'm not hoping for the
Petion-Dessalines-Christophe salad. I'm hoping for the Geffrard-Firmin
nicoise, with a light Toussaint vinaigrette and a nice Mandela seasoning.
Just a pinch of salt.

best,
Thor Burnham

>From Thor Burnham in Gros Morne:

Janet Higbie stated:

"A rhetorical question:  Is the sparring match between Burnham and Du Tuyau
reminding anyone else, other than me, of Dan Quayle v. Murphy Brown?"

Hey, Du Tuyau, Higbie doesn't think you are a real person, personally
speaking. What do you make of that? I'm shocked, shockingly so. Could it
be!!?? And she says that slick willy was impeached, Ken Starringly so, but
not convicted
Oh, by the way, are we sparring, Du Tuyau? What do you think? Sounds so,
Americanly American great States...but in the event we are coming out of our
corners for another round, I'm Lennox Lewis and you can be Mike Tyson. Deal?

By the way, Du Tuyau, funny you should mention this stuff about human rights
organizations. I went and talked to some people who know everybody who works
in one of the kitchens now, and everybody who has worked there the last 25
years. I told them i've got this crazy salad tosser accusing the human
rights organizations of not only being biased, but also of being
deliberately dishonest. I said, "My friend has been tossing salads too
long". They said, "Hey, listen Ti bout patat, that saladmaker friend of
yours is onto something, there. Neg sa kone sa l'ap di!". Another friend, he
makes a nice club sandwich, tells me that you are the first one in ten years
who has addressed the question of the human rights organizations and their
legitimacy. "After all, anyone can call themselves a human rights worker,
can't they?"

And, Monsieur Du Tuyau, wouldn't you know it if i didn't hear some other
stuff this weekend about NCHR....hmmmm. But who is funding NCHR now, Du
Tuyau? Aren't they member driven and funded? Aren't they righteous? Are you
arguing that the big chef now is so biased against Aristide that everything
NCHR does is tainted? wow. serious stuff. So, are you saying that evey
though they claim to be tossing a better Christophe salad, they are in fact
tossing a salad Duvalier? Or a Waldorf makout? Are the people running the
day to day in bed with the people they are investigating? That would be
pretty bad, wouldn't it? I hope that isn't the case, since it might throw
everything into disrepute..

Du Tuyau states:

"So,  ...  and therefore, ... and logically speaking, they chose in the
choice of smart public relations, they chose Jean-Jacques Honorat to run
over government that responsibility in the eventuality of time, was
responsible for 3, maybe 4, maybe 5,000 poor Haitian people death. So you
understanding me now a little Mister Burnham, when I always a little bit
suspicious of human rights organizations."

Hmmm. You know, maybe you are right. I went the other day to talk to one of
my favourite cooks. He makes a real nice griot, you know, not too greasy,
but nice and soft. I mentioned you, the saladtosser, and He told me that he
was dumbstruck when the Ford Foundation and the U.N. decided to fund JJH as
a human rights worker. But i said, "Come on, why would they choose someone
like that?" He looks at me and says, "Monsieur te kone tout detay, net!" Of
what, i asked him. My Griot says, "JJH knew every little detail. He knew who
the opposition was in detail, specifically speaking." But I said, "c'mon,
this is the U.N. we're talking about!?" He says, "Exactly my point!!" In
fact, he said, "Just look at the United Great States. They are recycling
Otto Reich, Elliot Abrams, John Noriega and John Poindexter. It's the same
thing, isn't it?"

Du Tuyau states:

"So, if we're  using it this method in the correctiveness of things, that
method correctly correctamente, we know, we know for sure that something is
being cooked in the kitchen. And Mister Burnham, it is not
Dessalines-Petion-Toussaint-Christophe salad."

Ok, but wait a minute Du Tuyau, who's kitchen are we talking about? I think
i know which kitchen i'm talking about. And you say you know which kitchen
you are talking about. Are we talking about the same kitchen? You first.

Du Tuyau States:

"It may be the Conze salad. I no like Conze salad."

Which Conze are you talking about? Is this the traitor salad, or the
Catholic Saint salad? Or are those the same thing? Maybe its the Butler
Salad? Or the Cole Cucumberland?

Du Tuyau States:

"So Mister Burnham, who responsibility is responsible for NCHR all day every
day every time? Mister Jonathan Demme? Or the chefs in Haiti and United
States Great States that do work daily activity every day? Please tell me a
little."

Personally, while i like Jonathon Demme a lot, especially the Philadelphia
movie (has a great soundtrack too, don't you think?) you are right, he's
probably not running the day to day.

This reminds me. I used to work with a guy from South Africa. We worked
together for a garbage company. Always interesting to see what people threw
out. One day while we were hauling boxes of old Victoria Secret Underwear
magazines to the truck, I started to ask him some questions.(and we didn't
look at one magazine, by the way) When I asked him what he did before he
came to my country he said he was in the South African military. He was in
charge of a small troop of peacekeepers in one of the townships. For months
and months when he and his group would go out on patrol, people would
complain and complain and complain that the gov't was funding and supporting
a paramilitary group that worked the townships at night, arresting and
disappearing activists and troublemakers. My friend says he argued with
people all the time about the existence of this mysterious group, always
saying that if they existed he would know. He said, "There was no way I
could not have known what was going on." But then he got quiet. He told me
that six months later he found out that indeed there was secret police
activity going on in his area. They were harassing people, kidnapping,
raping and torturing others, and of course disappearing those who were
intractable.

sigh. I hope you are wrong about the NCHR, Du Tuyau. But I have an awful
feeling you are right. But I also have to say, I'm not hoping for the
Petion-Dessalines-Christophe salad. I'm hoping for the Geffrard-Firmin
nicoise, with a nice Toussaint vinaigrette.

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