15172: Nadal: Re: Haitian psychology . (fwd)

[Bob Corbett <corbetre@webster.edu>]

From: Olivier Nadal <o_nadal@bellsouth.net>

I did not write the following message, but I think it is worth sharing it
with the Corbett List .
Olivier Nadal


42 ways to tell if you're Haitian


 FOR HAITIAN EYES ONLY!!!

 You know that you're Haitian when ..

 42. Your parents still put you "a genou" even though you are 19.
41. You use bed sheets as window curtains.
40. You, the ladies, bring your own box of perm to the beauty parlor to get
a cheaper deal.
39. You ate rice within the past 3 days.
38. You eat too much chicken, diri kole, or diri djon djon.
37. Your living room couches are covered with plastic.
36. You know where the nearest Hatrexco/Bobby Express is.
35. You buy your cereal at Farmer's Market.
34. You buy your Fruits at Basket Market.
33. You try to bargain your way out of everything and anywhere even in
department stores.
32. You keep a "bokit" (bucket) by your bed for added ease and convenience.
31. To get out of trouble with a fellow Haitian, you use the phrase: "bon
sa-ou giyin la?, se Ayisien nou ye mon(ma) che."
30. Once the temperature gets below a certain level, you lose all concepts
of coordination when it comes to things lke snow boots, winter coats,
scarves,  and hats often doing things like wearing two different color hats
at the same time.
29. You or your parents have a bottle of "Ombre Rose" or "Eau de Caron"
(Perfume) sitting on your dresser.
28. You have a bunch of expensive perfumes on your dresser but prefer to use
the cheaper ones because you don't want to waste your good stuff.
27. You point at things and people with your lips.
26. You just don't feel fresh until you've drenched yourself in "Bien Etre"
(Eau de Cologne)
25. When you're house is so packed with meubles and *biblos* that you can't
even take two steps, and there are entire rooms in your house that no one is
allowed to go in because they are reserved for company.
24. When you have three sets of china: odd, even, and mix matched
plates,bowls, glasses and cups for your household the kind that come with
flowers that is only reserved for company that you haven't seen in years or
extremely special occasions and the kind in the display cabinet that will
only come out for careful cleaning and then go right back in.
23. You feel no obligation to bring gifts to anyone's celebration because if
they are celebrating, then they are obviously doing better than you, so they
couldn't  possibly need anything. As a matter of fact, they should be giving
you a gift for taking time out to come, and if they don't volunteer a gift
then you'll help yourself to one, such as plates full of food or any
decorations that were on display  for the celebration.
25. You might be late for a wedding or don't even show up at all, but damn
it, you  are early for the reception. And of course you bring home a plate
wrapped in  aluminum foil and some gateau.
24. You can never throw out an empty container/can.
23. You suck your teeth (tuipé) when you're fed up.
22. You know what lok, *medsin* (Laxative) is.
21. You prefer juice in the form of concentrated syrup.
20. The weakest old woman can strike fear into your heart with just one
look..
19. When you really get mad at someone you want to take off your shoe and
slap him or her with it.
18. You prefer salt and pepper in your peanut butter rather than sugar.
17. Saturday is "bouillon day" at your house
16. Yawning more often indicates hunger than fatigue.
15. All soda is called cola.
14. Maggi, Matouk's/Tabasco, & tomato paste are cooking essentials.
13. You refuse to throw out old grease. So that everything you fry has that
taste of fried fish, chicken, bannan pese, or griot.
12. You're ready to die for some te (tea)
11. the US is only made up of three cities: Miami, NY, Boston.
10. 2001 is more significant than the year 2000.
  9. Deep fried pork (griot) is one of your favorite dishes.
  8. You have either Jean or Marie placed somewhere in your name and you
know someone named Marie Rose.
  7. Your furniture is too big for your house.
  6. You dip bread in your coffee, hot chocolate, and even certain kinds of
liquor (Kremas).
  5. You go to work as though you were dressed for Church, you go to Church
dressed for a wedding, and you go to a wedding dressed to meet Queen
Elizabeth.
  4. When you hear "pssssssssst", you know that someone is trying to get
your attention.
  3.You nod your head upward to greet someone when you're too busy to talk.
  2. When you visit someone, it has to be just long enough so that they
can't say that you didn't come by and not too long so that they can't say
that you have nothing better to do than to be sittin' up in someone else's
home.

 AND THE NUMBER ONE INDICATOR OF BEING AYISIEN IS
 1. If someone says that the party starts at 6pm, then you know not to show
up until 10PM.

 Pass this on to all the Haitians you know. Voye message sa bay yon moun
ayisien (and don't do it on Haitian time)