26203: Fwd: Du Tuyau (Interview with Simeus) (fwd)

[Bob Corbett <corbetre@webster.edu>]

From: viandemoulue@aol.com

The next day in the morning and early, I go to Gonaives fictitiously to speak
for interview with Mister Simeus. I only have tape recorder in plastic bag. I
walk there and I see him for speaking to me, all-ready.

DT- Good morning, Mister Simeus
Simeus- I am blessed!!
DT- I know you blessed. Every time I hear you speak somewhere, you tell the
same thing: "I am blessed". I need little blessing like you but not now. I no
think possible for ever I have all that money you have and is okay... it's
okay ... but we need to talk Haiti. It's okay, talk Haiti?
Simeus- Yes, Du Tuyau, I am blessed and I talk Haiti with you.

So, interview started and Mister Simeus promise to me, no more saying "I am
blessed" because everyone knows that he is blessed with loads of cash money.

DT- Good morning again!
Simeus- To you, good morning with all my blessing and God's.

DT- Thank you. Why you want president for Haiti?
Simeus- Because I have experience management. I like problems for resolving
them. I did that at Beatrice Food and now, I want to do that for Haiti
political.

DT- Do you not think prezidan of Haiti is different very much from prezidan
and ownership of company in United Country of Great States?
Simeus- I know. The challenge is great and I love challenges. I will succeed
with all the help of my people, from Gonaives to Grand-Goave to St-Marc to
Jamais Vu!!

DT- Oh man, Jamais Vu /Never Seen!! You know that locality too, hein? You
really Haitian but I have other questions for you. Pertinently difficult for
you maybe to answer but serious.
Simeus- Go ahead!

DT- Do you know, that prezidan d'Ayiti is like swimming in the sea with
sharks? That everyone who have no become prezidan and want job will swim
together in coordination like nice ballet of Danube Bleu, and swallow you
politically?
Simeus- I know. But I have great help from organizations close to republicans
in Washington like HDP, Haiti Democracy Project.

DT- So you think, that when Haitian politicians want prezidans, they will
listen to HDP and take-it-easy?
Simeus- I have great talent. I overcome all kinds of problems like that!!

DT- Okay, more serious question I have for you. It's how people political call
it again?  It's procedural question.
Simeus- Go ahead! I am all ears.

DT- Mister Simeus, do you understand that as of now, it is no legal according
to law constitutional of Haiti for you to be candidate for prezidan or for you
to become prezidan?
Simeus- What do you mean? I never renounced my nationality?

DT- That issue is no issue. I know and we know that you never renounced
nationality of yours. That's okay. Is okay. The problematic is, that you took
one more nationality and the law for nationality is no changing yet on this
issue, in Haiti.
Simues- I know; this knowledge of the fact is why I hired a team of competent
and savvy lawyers for great resolution.

DT- Do you no think, Mister Simeus, that is better maybe for you to fight
first for changing laws with amendment constitutional with next parliament,
and then you can presentation of candidacy for prezidan in 2009? You only 65
years now. You very young man with solid health, you look. Maybe better for
you to respect procedural, legal, constitutional law of Haiti and then, you
can be better prezidan next time if people vote for you and you win in 2009.
Simeus- Yes but in the meantime of all the meanwhiles, Haiti is sinking bad
and badly.

DT- I know Sir, I understand but ... Haiti's been sinking for 200-plus years,
no offense. Little 5 more years is maybe better for experiencing and knowing
the sharks first... No disrespect for your greatness of accomplishment, you no
need to be prezidan to be help wonderful for Haiti. You already have Simeus
Foundation that helps lots of people. We need elite people like you in Haiti,
elite with a conscience...
Simeus- So you want for telling to me to give up candidacy?

DT- Sir, I no have such right. I only fake, fictitious journalist asking to
you real questions vital I believe.
Simeus- Why you no support my candidacy?

DT- Sir, I support you for great effort. This candidacy is Pandora; opens up a
seriously important box for all diaspora. I remember...

Simeus- So why you no support?
DT- Sir, it's principle for me. I remember you mad last time at Lavalas
government under Preval because they sell flour company, La Minoterie d'Haiti,
and no let rich Haitians like you know about it. Their Bovarysm benefitted
the "blan", no us/we diaspora with conscientious elite like you. I happy that
day when I hear you speak about it in Washington capital because, you wanted
investment in Haiti and business is one you know.
Simeus- So, you know that and still why you not supportive of me?

DT- I cannot for many reasons. One, principally constitutionally procedural;
two, autocratically dangerous... three ..
Simeus- You want to say, I autocrat?

DT- That's no what I want for saying at all. The system political in Haiti is
design-style autocratic. You candidate that way is suggestion that only
executive branch can do something for Haiti. I think it's no good way to see
it and we need for working to change the system first and primero...
Simeus- Primero ... What primero? Don't speak your batey Spanish to me. I busy
now. I have to go.

DT- Okay. I wish you luck but for your own good, I hope you no become
prezidan. Haiti is tè glise / muddy-sliding land. Those sharks will eat you
live on television and radio. They all quiet now but belief of me: yo pare
youn po kann pou wou ak tout foumi (they preparing sugar cane skin for you
filled with ants to throw at you). I suspect you can help better change
nationality issue for next time around so maybe you become better candidate
for prezidan...
Simeus- You citizen other country too?

DT- Oh no ... no yet. I still Haitian legal but I no interest political. I no
speak French or English good. I only speak little Kreyól and very little
education for me. I no want candidacy for nothing. I only hate to see you
eaten alive by the political sharks. Plus, legality is essential for progress
and rational-istic society..
Simeus- Okay. You no very disrespectful today but we disagreement. I say you
go now. I have other meetings importantly with staff.

I quietly with timid shyness, stand up to go. At that moment, I see lady tall
and beautiful, like milked coffee color with nice smile on me: a beautiful
Haitian gazelle with a Senegalese girlish smile. I, for two second only, look
at her while imagination of me run wildly complicated in the shadows of her
beautifulness. I say good bye fast to her and Mister Simeus laughs at my look.
He understand that I have tchiki-tchiki thoughts and so, he show me the door.
For my second interview, I had sadness no for Mister Simeus, but for the
beautiful I will not see again that girl. I decided, I am now going for next
interview with Mister Marc Bazin.

Stay tuned, if you want. Maybe if Jean-Juste candidate for real, I go to Haiti
for interview with this absolutely dangerous tèt cho / hot headed, too. But
Bazin first, next time.

Du Tuyau.